Grand Theft Chapstick: The Ultimate Betrayal

Trust: it’s a thing that’s difficult to earn but quick to lose.

Do you ever have those days when you are just done with everyone in your household? Today is one of those days. It’s bad enough that I’m on Thanksgiving break and yet I have to drive the 54 miles to school for a makeup harp lesson (thanks terrible immune system for me constantly being sick!), but on top of it all I had my trust broken this morning. What happened you may ask? Everyone in this freaking house is a damned thief. Everyone.

My cats are thieves: Arthas has a thing for stealing pens. Sindragosa has a thing for stealing your seat in the office mere milliseconds after you’ve gotten up from it. And Kerrigan? She will steal anything that’s not nailed down. Hair ties are her favorite but she really doesn’t discriminate. She’s stolen my claddagh ring that my parents gave me on my 16th birthday (which I still haven’t found yet), she’s attempted to steal a few bucks I had laying on the dining room table, she’ll steal the water from your cup if you leave it sitting for too long, and she’s also tried to steal my wedding rings. But as annoying as these acts of thievery are, these aren’t the ones that hurt the most.

This morning while I was getting ready for my day I discovered the most hurtful act of thievery that’s occurred in this household. This morning, I discovered that Mr. Envoy had stolen my chapstick. MY chapstick. It all started out so innocent… he asked me last night if we had any chapstick because the weather had really chapped his lips so I told him that I had some on my side of the bathroom counter that he could use. Notice the key word there: use.

Well when I was getting ready this morning I went to put some of my chapstick on because my lips are in a constant struggle against the dry weather we’ve been having and what do I discover? I discover that my chapstick is gone. GONE!!! I couldn’t believe my eyes. I thought surely that Kerrigan must have stolen it this morning while I slept, but I texted Mr. Envoy and all he said was “Oops”.

“Ooops”. “Ooops”? Really?

Betrayal. Absolute and utter betrayal. I’ve come to expect it from our cats, but from my husband? Oh no… that’s it I’m done with this household for today. Done!

…and to think that today I found Mr. Envoy’s hair clippers that he’d been searching months for. Hrmph.

<3 and harp strings,


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